Valentine’s Day 2019

Happy Valentines Day! It’s a funny thing that we need a holiday to celebrate the people we love the most…wouldn’t it be nice if we remembered to do that each day on our own? Maybe we need an app for that. Lol

Thich Nhat Hahn in his book True Love, says, “The most precious gift you can give to the one you love is your true presence…When you are really there, you have the ability to recognize the presence of the other. To be there is the first step, and recognizing the presence of the other is the second step. To love is to recognize; to be loved is to be recognized by the other” (pp. 6-7 and pp. 13-14).

To recognize and be recognized…seeing another and allowing ourselves to be seen… that is the beauty, the simplicity, and the challenge of love. It seems as though seeing and being seen would be the easiest with a significant other. As we share our lives with someone it seems natural to really know our partner and to be known…to be present and to recognize the presence of our other.

And yet sometimes this may be where our greatest fears lie. When we are invested in a relationship and hang our expectations upon it, we can become too scared to really be ourselves. The risk of loss or rejection can feel too big…too risky. And yet our relationships can only grow as much as we allow them too…as much as we can risk…as much as we can bear to be seen with all our flaws and imperfections….as much as we can allow ourselves to be loved and to love another with all their flaws and imperfections…to be fully present and fully aware of the presence of our other…spouse, friend, brother, sister, mom, dad, grandparents…whoever our other is in that moment.

Happy Valentine’s Day and here’s to being present and being aware of the presence of others all year long…not just on a holiday where a fat baby shoots you with an arrow…crazy holiday. 😉